You might say, “Hey! How’s school going?” or “Hi! It’s been a long time since we’ve talked. I was wondering how you’ve been. ”
For example, you might ask them to meet with you at a local coffee house that just opened. However, it might be best to avoid asking them to meet you at your lunch table or at your home. Say, “Want to grab a cup of coffee at Good Beans?” or “I’m going to feed the ducks at the park. Wanna come?”
You could say, “I know things have been rocky between us, but I don’t like that. I’d much rather us be friends,” or “We’ve had some conflicts in the past, but I think we have a lot in common. Maybe we could try being friends. ”
For example, you might both enjoy playing soccer, you may both like being creative, or you might both like the same TV show.
For instance, you might host a game night at your home, or you could make plans to see a movie as a group.
You might say, “I know that you made up that embarrassing nickname that everyone calls me. It really hurt my feelings that you did that. ”
You could say, “I know that I hurt your feelings, and I’m really sorry about that. I hope you can forgive me,” or “I know you’re mad that I dated your ex, and I totally understand that. I’m really sorry for hurting your feelings. ”
Telling them you forgive them can go a long way toward forming a friendship. Say, “I appreciate what you said. I forgive you for what happened. ”
For instance, you might recognize that they’re outspoken, they’re good at listening, and they’re kind to animals.
For instance, let’s say both of you signed up for the same volunteer position and you find out that they talked to the person in charge to increase their chances of getting it. That might make you feel like they went behind your back. However, you could choose to believe that they had no intention to hurt you and just really care about the job.
For instance, you might talk to them every day at work or school. Additionally, you might send each other memes back and forth.
Try to repeat back what they said to you. You might say, “Wow, it sounds like work is really stressful right now. ” Ask them follow-up questions so they know you’ve been listening. You might ask, “Did you ever figure out what happened?” or “What are you going to do now?” Try to bring a non-judgmental attitude to the conversation. Make sure the person knows that you’re there to listen and be supportive.
For instance, you might start by telling them about a goal you’re pursuing. Then, you might reveal a few of your interests that only your friends know about. After you’ve been friends awhile, you might feel comfortable talking about your secrets or personal problems. Similarly, don’t pressure someone else to open up to you about their past. Build a strong relationship first; when the time is right, they’ll start to open up.
For example, you might invite them to go watch your favorite sport together, or you could ask them to join you for a horror movie fest if you both like scary movies. Use your common interests to help you pick good activities.
For example, let’s say you and your former enemy used to get really competitive with each other. You might set a boundary that you won’t trash talk each other. Similarly, you may be worried that you’re going to share too much information too fast. To prevent this, you both might agree to start your friendship with group hangouts instead of one-on-one activities.